All the Disorder

Last week was it, I gave my last test, graded them, filled out report cards, and gave the tests back to the students today. As always, I was bombarded with students saying "Sir, please sir..". Most of the time it is because they do not understand how they got their grade or they have changed their answer and expect me to change their grade. I imagine that some of them are being truthful about the answer and I look at the test, but after so many I get annoyed and ask them if they would prefer to have a zero instead of the 15/20 they recieved. For the most part, that doesn't clear them out until I get out my grade book and start acting like I'm changing grades. It seems cruel I know, but I think cruelty is allowed on my part. My cruelty is minor compared to what I went through the entire year.

As I think about the past year, I can only seem to remember the classes where I never got anything accomplished. Most of the year was trying to keep order in the classroom, I'm not sure that was ever accomplished. When I had site visits from Peace Corps Admin there was order, mainly because I told the students that if they misbehave I will be sent to another town and they will have no English teacher. Ha ha...little two faced punks. I call them two faced because, well, they are. In larges groups they don't listen, don't understand, talk to each other, hit each other, who knows what else. In smaller groups or when another teacher/admin enters their presence, halos are visible over their heads and you can hear a pin drop in the silence of the overcroweded classroom. As the new teacher, I was subject to more of their uhm...let's say unangelic side.

From January until the end of March, the library was in use daily. It was somewhat organized and made sense, students were borrowing books and bringing them back. However, with the advice of the vice principal I stopped loaning books before spring break. Why you ask? Mainly because it is too close to the end of the year and students would keep the books for themselves and they would never be seen again. At least that was the VP's reasoning. Now, the library is still somewhat organized, there are now a couple of computers that the admin was hiding somewhere. I suppose it's a good starting point for next year. I am trying to write a Peace Corps Partnership to get some money to buy books, chairs, tables, shelves, paint, more light fixtures, and computer desks.

The one thing I don't want to be is a babysitter for the library or a discipline agent for the classroom. I think that is one reason why this proposal writing has been delayed so much (by me). The other reason is probably as simple as I wanted to do something else. It's a lame reason, but it's the truth. I had 4 jobs in the states before I came here, and I feel like I do more here than I was doing then (and I don't do much here, lol. I'm not sure what that says about those jobs or this one, but I'm just keepin it real).

I plan on working less teaching hours at the lycee next year because I would like to teach at the teachers training school and perhaps work with some other NGO's teaching an English class. It's possible that I could have the same results this time next year or I could be successful. It all falls on my shoulders really. I think the one thing I need to start doing more of is planning, I've pretty much flown by the seat of my pants since I started teaching (sorry Dylanna, lol). I think maybe I've lived a little too long with the "whatever happens, happens" attitude and maybe it's time to change that. Should I set goals and try to reach them? It seemed to have worked out the other times I've done that, making the Dean's list every semester for two and half years, finishing my last semester in college with a 3.9gpa, and raising my cumulative gpa out of the gutter.

I've practically started my summer vacation already. It will be a fun time I'm sure. I honestly feel like my time here is almost up, even though I still have a year to go. I suppose I have some time to figure things out now that all the disorder is over.

(Check the photo page for some pics of the library and lycee)